Weekend update

Hello folks! Happy Sunday afternoon to all of you! Other than having a great morning at church, It's been a great weekend just doing a lot of nothing. Finally got to whip out some of my sandals! Also, I finally got a new camera! I had lost our old one, and had been using the sorry camera from the IPad... Also, I don't have a smart phone (thats another post all together), so taking pictures is a really intention thing for me. Anyways it's very nice to have a new one. It's nothing fancy, but that's okay, because I'm not a photographer, and I'm not sure my pictures would look any better with a fancy camera. Here are a few pictures form the weekend.

This is the weird side room of our apartment. It has such beautiful natural light. It really is one of my favorites spaces. 

 Just a little Saturday afternoon inspiration happening here. I'm not really much of an artiste, but it really is very sweet to sit with my worship music on, and reflect, and paint. Also I'm a chronic cursive writer, I hate printing, so I invested in ($3.99) in a caligraphy pen. It has instantly made everything I write look way more fancy!

A friend of mine, Gennean, from college wrote in her blog about an app she had been using called She Reads Truth  its a Bible study app. It really is one of the most beautiful apps, and I've been obsessed with it since I got it. There is a "Bible in a Year" track that isn't as intimidating as some of the ones I've seen. I read Psalms 5 today along with another Old Testament portion of scripture, and This just stuck out to me so much as this is how I've been trying to start every single day with God. 

What inspires you on the weekends? Do you need a little push? Do you need to hear from the Lord? Scripture is the best place to look. Pray about it! Take a walk! Listen to your favorite music! Right now I've been listen to Stephanie Frizell Gretzinger's The Undoing, and Bethel Music's We Will Not Be Shaken if you need a little suggestion :)

Like A Fire In My Bones

Hello everyone!
For those of you who are unaware, I am a teacher at Christian high school. I teach four different subjects at VCS; The Life of Christ According to the Gospel of John, Chapel Leadership (Worship band for chapel), Choir, and Drama. This is right in line with what I studied in school, and since I spend so many years in youth ministry before going back to college, it really is the perfect job for me. Every single day is a true adventure.

Yesterday I took a survey in my bible classes to find out where they were at with Chapel and how they thought it could be better. It broke my heart. While they did come up with some really good objective things that we could change, and we came to a resolution to make chapel better, my students said they felt condemned, not redeemed. I have have never felt that way about Chapel, but it was clear that they were hearing something different than what I was hearing. One student actually said "The God you talk about in class and the God in they talk about in Chapel are not the same. The God in Chapel just sounds so angry." 

Oh my precious students. This is not how God feels about you.

I couldn't and cannot shake the words from my heart. And while it made me sad to hear the frustration of my students, it also gave me an overwhelming sense of purpose and protectiveness (if that's even a word). It reminded me what my job truly is. Not as a teacher, but as a Christian.  

The God in chapel and the God in Bible 10, and the God at my church are all the same God. The entire Bible being about Jesus from cover to cover means that God is about forgiveness, The Word is to point us to Hope! The Word points out that Jesus has come so that we don't have to live up to the pressure of perfection. The Word points to grace! The Word is love. The Word IS Jesus. 

Everything Is Worth It's Weight In Time

Hello everyone! Nate and I took a little day trip to the beach for Valentine's Day. Despite the fact that we already live in a place that happens to be very romantic, we needed a little getaway. Here are a few pics of the day. 

Here's to our 6th Valentine's Day together, and infinity more.

Every couple has their place they love to go, Santa Cruz is definitely ours. We've made a little tradition of going Santa Cruz for Presidents' Day weekend, it just happened to be the same weekend!

This guy. I really couldn't ask for a more wonderful husband. We have endured through a lot, and more is coming, I know it. Our day was filled with great food, grat weather, great shopping, and great first conversation about our future and our family and all sorts of great stuff. God is so good, and his timeline is perfect. Can't wait to see what these next few years have in store for us! See you soon :)

Saturday's and Succulents

It's a no makeup kind of Saturday. Nathan's away recording vocals for the kingdom album that's coming out this spring, so I'm just kinda hanging out at the house. We only have one car on the weekends, typically, so it's a good oppertunity for Bible reading, music playing, Friends DVD watching, and chore doing... The first three were already checked off the list, so the chores are all that are left. Oh yeah, I can check off one of my New Years resolutions... I chopped off my hair. 

And I Thought To Myself, "I Can Do That!"

When I was in high school, I was told by a Choir Director in passing conversation that he never gave solos to anyone who asked for one, because it meant their heart wasn't in the right place. He also said if you were good enough, you would just get asked to be in leadership/get a solo/get to lead worship. At the time I agreed, and acted in accordance with what I thought was a really righteous way of selecting leaders. This eventually formed me into a person so scared of looking prideful, I never ever put myself out there musically. This lead to me to being overlooked (not in a mean-spirited, or poor-leadership kind of way), wondering why I wasn't moving forward, then ultimately wondering if I was good enough.  I was at the point where I was thinking that maybe I had been fooling myself my entire life. My senior year of college was a time of questioning, and a lot of soul searching. 

The point of that weird anecdote is this: I was holding on to a lie, and it grew in my heart into debilitating fear. It wasn't until very recently that I began to pray in earnest for the Lord to change my heart and my thinking on this. 

Music comes very naturally to me. My piano is an extension of my arms. I can't not sing a song I know while riding in the car. God doesn't give us gifts and talents, so we can hide it away. I had a little light and I was hiding it (under a bushel...no!).

It was being at Desperation conference in CO where God really broke the chains in my heart. I had honestly thought that song "Break every chain" was silly emotional crap until then. It was watching people doing what they were obviously called to do, and doing it confidently and unapologetically. 

My stream of thought went a little like this, "Oh my gosh, Lord please forgive me, I have been so wrong. I have been so resistant, and so falsely humble.... I can do that, Lord, I'm gonna do it....(tons of crying)." 

So, here I am now. I'm not doing it on a huge stage with thousands of people. I'm not writing instant hits with viral Youtube videos. But I'm doing it. Nathan and I are writing for real for the first time. We are leading together for real for the first time. We are as poor as we were in the beginning and there is fear in stepping out...but there is provision. I guess the ultimate point of this blog is this:

There is peace in obedience, and no money can buy that.